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'Just Another Sunday At The Death Matches?'

Author: Sid6.9 ()
Date: 2000-04-16 00:00:00

This is an in-character post about the Friday Night War Room Death Matches. If you dislike the Friday Night War Room Death Matches then you probably want to hit the back button now.

Still with me? Good then lets proceed…

No one is at the Death Matches. In face a sign outside the door reads, due to mass illness thanks to Big Sexy’s Crabcakes, the Death Matches have been cancelled for 14 April 2000. We apologize for the inconvenience…

It’s dark inside the Death Match arena, the only light provided is by the exit signs illuminating the area just surrounding it. The only noises that can be heard is the whirring of the Air Conditioner as well as a few beeps from the cameras dotted throughout the Death Match Arena, and a few squeaks from the mice that make their home here in the Arena now. The cameras whir and buzz as they pick up faint images of two people standing by a doorway, their faces cannot be seen, but one of them is wearing combat style boots, the microphones inside the walls pick up a brief conversation…

Voice #1- Is it ready?

Voice #2- Yes, it was difficult getting around all the damn security cameras, but I did.

Voice #1- Excellent.

Voice #2- Ehh, is it wise that we do this now? I mean we have everyone fooled already, and you have virtual contro…

The other person silences the second somehow, then speaks to him…

Voice #1- Silence, this walls have ears.

Voice #2-………………* Whispers * But shouldn’t we take care. I mean, what if they find out?

Voice #1- It does not matter if they find out.

Voice #2- I understand sir, but what if this fails? What will we do then?

Voice #1- You really should have faith, this will not fail.

Voice #2- I’m sorry, but things happen where plans fail, and if we do, then you will be exposed and I certainly will be too.

Voice #1- * Laughs * That is going to happen anyways. And you should know, it won’t matter. You should really have more faith, the plan is perfect and we will come out win/win even if for some miraculous reason it does indeed fail.

Voice #2-…

Voice #1- Do you have any other queries #2?

Voice #2- No, no I guess I don’t, I’m just worried that they may find us out before the plan is unhatched. I mean, my plan almost worked, if it wasn’t for him!

Voice #1 (A little angry)- It’s because you didn’t wait for me fool! Your plan was good, your plan would have worked if not for one eventuality. You forgot about me, I really was upset with you about that.

Voice #2- I’m sorry, he didn’t tell me that you were with us.

Voice #1- He didn’t?!? But he said you were told already, he told me he told you.

Voice #2- No, he didn’t.

Voice #1- Seems someone is playing little mind games with us both. Keep your eyes and ears open around him, he is a dangerous ally, as we just found out now.

Voice #2- I will, personally I don’t see why we need him. I mean this Friday, the Death Match will be turned up on it’s ear, if all goes to plan.

Voice #1- It will, I can assure of that. And don’t worry, I have plans for our partner, if he decides to get cute on us.

There is silence…

Voice #1- Okay, after this Friday, if all goes well, we should not see each other again. And at that time, my friend, we will be the last ones laughing…

And with that the exit door opens and closes as the cameras continue to buzz and beep, a mouse runs up to the door, sniffs the air, then scurries away quickly…

Suddenly the screen goes dark as we are now in Y2T’s office…

Y2T- Hmmm, seems the Death Matches don’t just have mice living here, seems we have some Rats plotting things as well…

Head of Security- Y2T sir, we couldn’t determine who these men were, but we do know that they didn’t break in. There is no sign of it. They would either have to be Houdini himself, or have a key to get in un-noticed and without setting off the alarms.

Y2T spins in his chair and looks at the Security Guard…

Y2T- It is not that hard to get in here, Y2T was getting in here all the time. But then of course, I am the most Exciting man in Death Match today. I mean without a little “Y2T” there is never, and I mean e-e-e-e-ever any sunshine…

HOS- Ummm okay sir, well I’m not quite following you, but we will get right on what they were talking about…

Y2T- Ahhh that’s okay, whatever they are planning will fail.

HOS- But sir, how can you be sure, I mean you heard them, it happens this Friday! Aren’t you worried about what they may have planted here si…

Y2T puts a hand up at the Head of Security…

Y2T- Ahh, no, you see, they knew I would hear this tape. You see, with their thinking, they think I will tear apart this place, while I think they want me to think what they are thinking, cause thinking what they are saying would lead me to believe they are thinking something different. What do you think?

HOS- I think I need a nap now sir.

Y2T- Yes, yes, excellent, nap time, a wonderful idea! You run off now, find yourself a little cot or something. And don’t worry, whatever they are thinking won’t be what they say is what they are actually thinking. Just let ole Y2T take care of it. You may go now…

HOS (As he bows towards Y2T as he goes out the door)- Yes, Y2T, thank you.

Y2T (Thinking outloud)- Heh, heh, ever since I instituted that bowing to Y2T policy I really feel like royalty now, heh, heh. * Groan *

Y2T (As he grabs his belly)- * Groan * Ohhhh, those damn crabcakes from last week are still hounding me. Ohhhhhh, damn Big Sexy….

Suddenly Y2T gets up and charges into the bathroom…

A knock at the door emerges as Y2T shouts from the bathroom…

Y2T- Come in, but be warned, Y2T has dropped the load, and the train has left the station.

Voice (As it walks inside)- Y2T! Y2T! Oh my god, what is that smell!

Y2T- M and M is that you?

MM- Heh, heh, yeah it’s me, but what in the hell died in here?

Y2T- Oh sorry M and M, I’m still suffering from Rich’s gift that got everyone sick last Thursday.

MM- Yeah, well light a match next time.

Y2T- * Laughs * Heh, heh, no way man, I don’t want to go out the roof if I did that.

MM- * Laughs *

Y2T- Hey M and M, I don’t think I can do the preview show this week, I feel really horrible, damn Big Sexy and his Crab Cakes.

MM- Heh, heh, told you that they smelt funny.

Y2T- You think everything smells funny.

MM- Oh yeah, heh, heh, so who is going to do the Preview Show? Gotta have someone do it, and I doubt Announcer Dude can. I mean remember last time he was out there alone, I thought his head was going to explode.

Y2T- Well I’m going to try, but if you could be waiting I might need you to * Owwww * take over.

MM- Yeah I can do that. Hey gotta go, there’s some little kids outside waiting to see the new hero of the death matches, heh, heh. I’ll see you Monday though.

And MysteryMan leaves the room as Y2T ponders who will be in the Death Match this Friday…


Sid6.9- "If weird was a person, he'd be me!" :-)

'Just Another Sunday At The Death Matches?' - Sid6.9 - 2000-04-16 00:00:00
-cool. :) - Tridus - 2000-04-16 00:00:00