A Goon
While installing the aforementioned new hardware, I noticed that my computer had way too many gigabytes free. I therefore took the liberty of installing many games into these free gigabytes in an effort to ensure that those rarely-used gigabytes were still functioning properly. I also tested the games extensively to ensure that my disk access times were well within the expected boundaries. I am pleased to report that my disk is in good shape.
- David Hyatt (Mozilla progress report)
Liz's 27th birthday is in 0 hours days! Eeps...
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JOTM (Joke of the Moment)

Author: kwerkey ()
Date: 2000-04-09 00:00:00

A rich, lonely widow decided that she needed another man in her
life, so she placed a personal ad that read:

RICH WIDOW LOOKING FOR MAN TO SHARE LIFE AND FORTUNE WITH THE
FOLLOWING QUALIFICATIONS:

1. WON'T BEAT ME UP
2. WON'T RUN AWAY
3. HAS TO BE GREAT IN BED

For several months, her phone rang off the hook, her doorbell was
ringing constantly, she received tons of mail...all to no avail.
None of the men seemed to meet her qualifications.

Then one day the doorbell rang yet again. She opened the door to
find a man, with no arms and no legs, lying on the welcome mat.
Perplexed, she asked, "Who are you and what do you want?"

"Hi," said the man "Your search is over, for I am the man of your
dreams. I've got no arms, so I can't beat you up and I've got no
legs, so I can't run away."

The old woman asked, "What makes you think you're so great in
bed?"

To which he replied, "I rang the doorbell, didn't I?"


ETA: Closer than you think...

JOTM (Joke of the Moment) - kwerkey - 2000-04-09 00:00:00
-hahahahahah <nt> - lil bo shepherd - 2000-04-09 00:00:00
-ROFL!! - BandWidth - 2000-04-09 00:00:00