A Goon
A vote for the lesser of two evils is still a vote for Evil.
- Anonymous
School start again in 0 hours. Yikes!
Modified: August 09 2006.
Hits: 6774392/10535213
User: Anonymous Coward
Time: 0.03 seconds.

Read Message

The happy family, the pizza, and the security guard who didn't want any.

Author: Tridus ()
Date: 2000-03-21 00:00:00

(note: go here to catch up)... also note that the Mystery Man in here is one of the security guards (aka the Mystery Men), and is not the President of the same name.

*Sitting in the once again quiet room, Tridus and Sashie have been left alone after the disappearance of Rolando... its been a quiet couple of hours as Tridus meticulously goes over every little bit of Sashie's hardware to make sure that everything is in good working order.*

*Meanwhile, in another part of the Presidential Building, the remaining not severely injured Mystery Man is standing over the body of Sudirt looking confused.*

MM - *rubs his head* ugh... ok... we had one in the cell, then the President ran by with another one to meet this one. Then I got attacked by something... and after that I got attacked by one of these... but was it this one, or the other one? ugh... my head hurts. *He goes over and places a call to have the body removed, then walks back to the buildings security command centre and sits down at a console.*

*MM stares at the output of the monitor looking rather bored for a while, and then something catches his eye. He grabs the mouse and presses the "Back" button in "Building Explorer 4.1a", and the display goes back to the last security shot of a small room on the second floor, in which Tridus is sitting with a screwdriver reassembling a part of the case on his laptop.*

MM - hmmm....

*MM then gets curious and goes back and replays the log of what happened in the jail cell when Sudirt was killed.*

*He then goes back and replays when he got whacked by Tridus, and compaires the timestamps*

MM - damn him....damn him to hell! That bastard attacked me! Well... we'll just see about this!

*MM gets up and goes to the weapons locker, where he grabs a pistol and puts it into its holster, then goes looking for Tridus.*

** Tridus is most of the way done putting the case back on Sashie when the door bursts open and the Mystery Man comes in.**

MM - You!

*Tridus doesn't bother looking up*

T - oh hi Charlie... just put the pizza on the desk there and charge it to my usual account... because of the weird deliverly location today, you can tack on a $10 tip for yourself too.

MM - *looks kinda stunned by that for a second* what the hell? Listen you, your under arrest for attacking me!

T - *still hasn't looked up* he he... I don't have time for this Charlie, but its good to know you still have that sense of humor.

Sashie - umm daddy...

T - yes sweetie?

MM - god damnit I'm not a pizza delivery boy you idiot!

Sashie - daddy he doesn't have a pizza.

T - I know he just put it down didn't he sweetie?

S - no, there is no pizza at all.

T - well what the... *finally looks up* Ahh! what are you doing here, and where's my pizza damnit!?

MM - there is no pizza for you, only bread and water in the dungeon for the way you attacked me!

T - huh? what the hell are you talking about?

MM - damnit! you kicked me in the head when I stopped you in the hallway a few hours ago!

T - I did? thats funny, I don't remember kicking anybody. I must not have hurt you that badly if your standing here now looking bright as day, so why don't you just run along and let me finish up here ok?

MM - no I don't think so... on the authority of the office of the President of Riptide, I hearby place you under arrest.

T - oh bother...

*A guy in a Pizza Pizza uniform walks in (which is strange, since they don't deliver to this part of the world)*

Pizza guy - Hey Tri dude, got your piping hot pizzas here, swimming in bacon just the way you like it.

T - great! just set them down right here... charge it to the usual account, and take $10 for yourself for the prompt delivery to this rather obscure location.

Pizza guy - thanks! *sets the pizzas down, presses a few buttons on a small PalmPilot he takes out of a pocket, and then walks off*

T - well as you can see I have pizza now, so I really can't be arrested. I'll tell you what, if you just forget about the whole thing you can have a slice.

MM - wtf? *sees Tridus open the pizza box with like Triple Bacon among other things on it* A slice of that? hell no! Your under arrest, lets go!

*MM walks around the desk and grabs Tridus to lift him up. Tridus co-operates for about a second and a half, and then...*

T - Sashie, my sword!

MM - no you don't!

*MM grabs Tridus' right arm and pins it so the weapon will be useless to Tridus. Unfortunately for him, it appears in Tridus' left hand with a bright flash. Tridus quickly turns and slams the pommel of the short sword into MM's nose,forcing him to release his grip and stumble back in pain as blood starts flowing freely from his nose.*

MM - *with one hand clutching his nose* damn you! this time your coming with me! *he pulls the gun with his other hand and levells it at Tridus*

T - hmm... alright... I don't want to risk Sashie getting hurt in a fight... *drops the sword and looks out the window thoughtfully* hmm... looks like there's going to be a lightning storm, doesn't it Sashie?

*Sashie giggles, and suddenly a bolt of electricity flashes into life and forks its way directly into MM's hand, forcing him to scream again and drop the gun. Tridus grabs his sword again and runs towards the stumbling MM as a low battery alarm activates on the small laptop.*

*Tridus puts his foot on MM's gun and stands above him, holding the sword about a foot from his head.*

T - now... get lost, and don't bother me again. If I wanted to, I could have killed you right here and now. I hope letting you live makes you realize that I'm not really a bad guy, I just have a bad reputation.

*The MM stammers for a moment, still unsure of what happened to his gun hand... then he sees that he is in a no win situation, swallows his pride, and runs out of the room.*

*Tridus sets the sword down on the desk, sits back down, and calmly takes out his solar battery charger and plugs it into Sashie, placing the collector by the window to gather in the sunlight.*

T - now... to enjoy some pizza!

*Tridus starts eating pizza while he finishes putting the case back on Sashie, and then lounges idly playing against her in a game of Hearts.*


Changes in this story:

Thanks to rRaminrodts story, Sashie is happy again (with low batteries currently thanks to the electric blast). We learn that Tridus somehow has pizza delivered all the way from Canada, and it still makes it in under 30 minutes (or its free). MM #2 now has a broken nose to go with the concussion he sustained earlier (although he's still in better condition then MM #1 with the exploded arm).

"If there were no words, no way to speak... I would still hear you..." - Martina McBride

The happy family, the pizza, and the security guard who didn't want any. - Tridus - 2000-03-21 00:00:00
-Thirty minutes or it's free - The Lord DebtAngel - 2000-03-21 00:00:00
--oh come on, thats still not as bad as Matt... - Tridus - 2000-03-21 00:00:00
-People need to compliment good stories some more... - SM_007 - 2000-03-21 00:00:00
--thank you. :) - Tridus - 2000-03-21 00:00:00